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Posts Tagged ‘Movies’

Feeling super

The OLD Fantastic Four cast... really.

I’d be a liar if I told you I didn’t love comic books. I still collect a few, actually, though not nearly at the break-neck, wallet-deflating pace I used to in my teenage years. Of course, that reduction in the collection was simply due to the local comic shop closing when I was younger, and the cost of comics skyrocketing until I needed a full-time job just to support the habit.

Nowadays, I’m not quite so quick to drop my money on the counter. I’m not picking up comics to collect them with hopes they will fund my retirement in the future. Nor does a scantily-clad lady on the cover even get my attention anymore. Now I am mostly about storyline, and characters I really like. Doctor Who gets purchased for the lovely Kimberly, while I have a standing order for any and all Moon Knight comics.

But, what does get my attention these days isn’t on the paper inside those comic covers, but rather on the big screen. Super hero movies are coming out in droves, and I’m there buying tickets to each and every one of them. Some aren’t as good as others, but some are really great. So why do I go to all of them? Because I want them to keep making them. More and more, please. Read more…

The Pianist versus the Predator

March 19, 2010 4 comments

I’m flabbergasted on several levels this morning.

First, there are some brilliant minds who have been sitting around a table somewhere in Hollywood, sipping at bottled sparkling water and admiring each other’s fake tans and shimmering bleached teeth that have come up with the great idea of making yet another Predator movie. While it should come as no surprise to me that such genius exists in that corner of the universe, I just don’t understand how they convinced anyone to financially back a franchise that has made two, gigantic, steaming turd movies as their third and fourth installments.

I’m the first to say that I loved the original Predator flick. Arnold was the prototypical action hero who had bulging muscles and a tenacity for survival. The Predator was a bad-ass from another planet who got his jollies hunting people just like that. It was a match made in heaven and even had that beautiful “You’re one ugly mother fu%#er!” moment. If you’ve never seen Predator but don’t feel as though you have the time to watch it, you can see it in 60 seconds here.

The second Predator movie wasn’t nearly as memorable. While Danny Glover is always classic, the story and the action just wasn’t up to snuff with the first. During that time period in particular, it was a given a sequel just couldn’t hold water compared to the original (a few exceptions, I’ll admit). This was just kind of expected.

And then along came the craptastic Aliens vs. Predator. This movies was everything you hoped it wouldn’t be, retarded being one of them. The only way they could have made this movie suck anymore than it did would be to either set it in a courtroom and have it be a movie about Aliens suing the Predator, or make the viewer eat Rocky Mountain Oysters while a child-abusing priest whispers in their ear about the fact that they’re not oysters at all.

And as though to show you that making money will never be as important as making bad movies, Hollywood came out with a SEQUEL to AvP. I’ll admit that this one, called Requiem, wasn’t nearly as horrific as the first one–but that wasn’t hard to accomplish. In fact, I watched a YouTube video with a dung beetle pushing a giant piece of feces and it was better than the first AvP. True story.

So while the horse lay dead on the side of the entertainment highway, a bunch of people got together and started kicking at some point last year. They came up with the idea to make yet ANOTHER movie based on the Predator franchise. This one, called Predators, is slated for a July release this year. Read more…